June 2026

New ordinance requires verified flue clearance before Christmas Eve, delighting nobody A New Permit Joins the Pile SANTA MONICA, Calif. — County officials have introduced a new permitting requirement obligating beachfront homeowners to obtain verified chimney access clearance before Christmas Eve, a measure that has produced an immediate and substantial backlog and that officials have …

Snaking and dropping in reportedly reclassified as coal-eligible offenses ahead of the holiday A New Category of Misbehavior HERMOSA BEACH, Calif. — In a development that has sent ripples of anxiety through the Southern California surf community, the North Pole has confirmed that Santa’s naughty list will, for the first time this year, include wave-etiquette …

North Pole cites favorable jurisdiction as elves trade fur-lined boots for skate decks North Pole Cites Jurisdictional Flexibility VENICE, Calif. — Citing what its accountants described as a more favorable operating environment, Santa Claus has relocated a substantial portion of his manufacturing operation from the North Pole to a converted warehouse two blocks from the …

Meteorologists add festive variable to models as workshop denies any involvement Forecasters Introduce a Festive Variable SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Surf forecasters have quietly added a new variable to their predictive models this season, a phenomenon they are calling the Santa Swell, after a series of unusually clean winter pulses that meteorologists have been unable …

Workshop labor dispute spills onto the sand as workers seek paid time to check the surf Workshop Labor Dispute Reaches the Coast SAN CLEMENTE, Calif. — Elves working at the North Pole’s recently opened West Coast distribution point have voted to unionize, presenting management with a list of demands that includes, prominently, a paid dawn …